About Me

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Indiana, United States
I'm a mother of five of my own children, very blessed adoptive mommy to one, step mother to three! Married to a wonderful man who forgives ALOT! Grammy to 6!I also have the best "kids in law" that I could have! I am blessed to be able to baby sit for our grandchildren a few days a week. I am blessed to be able to NOW stay home full time to take care of our home, children, and grandchildren!!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

More Romance...especially for Missy......

I suppose I should EXPLAIN that title...More romance...especially for Missy...the name does NOT imply that I think Missy should have more romance. Nor do WE necessarily need more romance...except that Rog has been sick all week!! Does kinda put a halt to all the kissing and hugging, doesn't it?

Anyway, my blogger and facebook friend Missy has requested that she be told all about our romance! And since she has known Roger for many many years but has never TECHNICALLY met me, I thought it was only right that I fill her in on all the GOSSIP!

Actually, dear Missy, Roger and I met when we were 14 years old at Bethesda Christian School. Neither of us were impressed with each other and it remained that way while we attended school together. I thought he was stuffy and he thought I was a bit on the wild side. Neither was true...he is very quiet and I am simply WAY MORE OUTGOING than I need to be! (I always wanted to be a quiet little petite girl and I am NONE of those things...except I am a girl....) He is not very tall and I didn't think that he and I would go together very well so I didn't really consider him. I don't even remember talking to him and we did not have a very large class...maybe about 60 or so in our class?? I DO remember him giving me some of his "Roger Looks"...as if to say, "Ok, that's enough now..." (I still get those looks, by the way....)

Anyway, we both grew up went our separate ways and years went by. We briefly saw each other at a class reunion and I did talk to his wife on the phone. I actually knew her from elementary school and we rode the same bus to school. She even drew my name for our 5th grade Christmas gift exchange! We all attended the same Christian school in high school.

A year or so went by and I was called about her death. I was going through a divorce at the time but I remember thinking how sorry I was and that we had children about the same age. Another year went by and I had decided to move closer to my parents and I enrolled my children in the same Christian school that I had attended...not knowing that Roger had done the same thing with his children.

My daughter Becca and his son Gideon became fast friends...best of friends or worst of enemies!! They wound up in the Principal's office once or twice. (They were only six years old...)

We (Roger and I) were thrown together throughout the next two years since we both attended the same meetings and field trips. (I must admit that eventually I found out if he were going on the field trip before I volunteered....sneaky, huh??)

He eventually asked me if I thought I was ready to go to some singles events because he attended a church that had a large active adult singles group. I was going to some events at my church but I thought it would be fun to meet some other people too. I started attending a Bible study that Roger was leading....(Oh dear, he was QUICKLY becoming MY KIND of GUY!) and then other studies and more singles activities. EVERYONE thought we were dating but we weren't! We were just becoming very good friends.

Roger's older son told my older sister...who happened to be one of his teacher's...that HIS DAD was going to marry HER SISTER and she promptly told ME! I assured her that we were NOT dating and the boy was just "wishful thinking."

I told Roger that I needed to tell him that and he told me that he already knew because his son had told HIM as well.

We kept talking via email (the highlight of my day!!) and eventually I got a few phone calls from him before Roger said that we "needed to meet." It scared the life out of me and I was just positive that Roger wanted to tell me that he was NOT interested in me. I told him that we didn't need to "meet" and that I was fine, no problem.

Well, he insisted and we agreed to meet at Applebee's. We stayed for three hours while we talked and he discussed the "pros and cons" of dating...ME! I was halfway offended and halfway pretty excited. I understood that I had five children...he had three...and that we didn't make a lot of money. He also told me that there were "OTHER" women that he was interested in.


The next evening we hosted a singles' outing together to watch a Christmas program given by my church. HE showed up with another woman and sat there next to her. I was pretty upset but there happened to be a tall good looking man who asked ME to sit next to HIM sooo.......

What's good for the goose is good for the gander, right????

Roger turned around and motioned for me to move down there and sit next to HIM!! I got a rather smug look on my face and shook my head "no."

(I later found out that the lady he brought was NOT a date...they rode together and were just good buddies and had known each other for years and years...Whatever....)

We all went to a pizza place and the guy sat on one side of me and poor Roger sat across from me. (I was having a ball!!! That's not very nice to say, is it??)

So then came Christmas and Roger showed up at my house with Christmas cookies and his children and niece all carolling us. I was so impressed that he remembered that my daughter had severe allergies to nuts and that we couldn't have any walnuts or pecans in the house. My own family has a hard time remembering that sometimes so I was really impressed!

Over the next few months we kind of dated...secretly...and I wasn't completely sure he was the one. Sometimes he aggravated me and I didn't always answer his emails. I guess I didn't understand his sense of humor and his lack of commitment. One of our friends decided that we all needed a party so we had a "Groundhog Day Party."

Roger didn't go to the party but his best friend said to me, "I want to know why you haven't answered my friend Roger's emails for two weeks."

I was pretty happy that it evidently BOTHERED Roger enough to tell his friend that he hadn't heard from me in two weeks....so I said, "I want to know why YOU know that I haven't answered his emails in two weeks."

He just kind of got an awkward smile on his face and dropped the subject.

Before long, spring break came and we had been seeing each other a little bit. He went to Florida with his children to see his sister and I...being the poor person that I am...vacationed in Michigan for a few days. (I mean, who in their right mind leaves cold Indiana for even colder Michigan for spring break??) One evening, I got a long distance phone call IN THE HOTEL from him! Then it happened again the next night! He asked if he could see me the following Saturday!

When we finally saw each other...we met halfway since we lived a pretty good distance apart...I got in his van and he actually asked me if he could kiss me!! (I said no and slapped his face....NOT REALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I told him I was wondering if he was ever going to get around to doing that!!!! By that time we had "kind of" dated for 6 months!!)

Before that, he hadn't even held hands with me. What a gentleman!

So we started dating seriously but his friends were telling him that he should be seeing other women besides me. We had a discussion about that and I asked him if he were going to KISS other women? He promptly said NO!!! Well, I figured that we were well past that stage in our relationship...if he were kissing ME he shouldn't be seeing other ladies!! After all, I had waited for 6 months before I got a kiss and I wasn't sharing him with anyone else. I told him that we had a limited amount of time to "date/court" and I wanted to spend the time with him. I also asked him if he thought that God had brought us together. He said, "YES."
So....why question God, right????

He didn't date anyone else.

We dated for 2 years before he popped the question but he first asked ALL my family...his kids, my kids AND my parents...permission to marry me!!
He and I were supposedly walking to a restaurant in his town and we walked through the gazebo that we had recently had his daughter's wedding in and I turned around and there he was on his knees! His hands were shaking and he asked me if I would wear his ring! Of course, I said YES!

THEN we went to a different restaurant where all of our kids were waiting for us! (There were 12 of us for supper that night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

So, that's the story. (For the most part. I did leave out the part about walking in our town park after dark and getting cold. We decided to get into my full sized van and talk. He smooched me and just THEN, we were SURROUNDED by two police cars who had us cornered! Roger said, "Let's get out of here!" I couldn't move the van and I'm SURE the police preferred we stay where we were.... Anyway, I showed my license and registration and after explaining that we had been walking and got cold, they let us go....evidently the park was closed! I'm glad it didn't make the papers...."Youth Pastor and the Divorcee Caught in Lion's Park"....oh dear....)

We've had our ups and downs...the difficulties of a blended family of mostly teenagers are always with us. We are currently trying to get "OUR" house so that neither of us feel uncomfortable here. I thought it was a good idea to move into Roger's house and not uproot his boys. It wasn't a wise decision but hopefully one we can rectify someday soon.

But while I wish some things hadn't happened in blending our families, I wouldn't trade Roger for the world. He is one of my greatest gifts from God and the best friend I have ever had. I love spending time with him just doing silly things. (we do a lot of silly things....)

We are also really considering adoption. It is my greatest wish to raise a little child with this man of my dreams. I love him with all of my heart!!


  1. Great post! I sure enjoyed reading it. I was on the edge of my seat waiting to see if he was ever going to propose. LOL Have a great day. Winona

  2. I've only read the first to paragraphs, but I had to stop and comment. Then I'll go back to reading the rest.

    1. I'm ALWAYS up for more romance! The romancier the better, I say! :-) Ain't love grand?

    2. Hooray for all the GOSSIP!

    Okay, now back to reading.

  3. HOORAY! YOU'RE MARRIED TOGETHER! (As Liberty would say.)

    I totally loved this post. You kept me giggling all the way through. I'm so glad God thought of romance; He's wonderful!

  4. Oh dear...when I said there were 12 of us at the restaurant, I made a typo!! I should have said there were 14 of us!! We had a bouquet of roses (14) that represented all of us and we had 14 roses at our wedding as well. It was a nice remembrance of our engagement and HEY, it cut down on the cost of wedding flowers, too!!

  5. I enjoyed your love story. You two make a beautiful couple!